Sex and Sheldon

[Tuesday Pajamas]

It’s a hot topic! Sheldon Lee Cooper has had sex for the first time and only time (so far) and I thought I’d open this thread to discuss the way it was handled and for members to talk about how they feel about this development.

Here’s my take:

Shamy sex was shown as quite sacrificial. Sheldon proved his affection by offering a sexual experience as a gift, because he knew what it meant to her. It was not portrayed as mutual attraction and was very in keeping with the history of the character. I was interested to see what they would do next with that. Would they make Sheldon change is mind about sex and feel more desires towards her? It seems not so far. They writers have already gone back to the old “Amy hints, Sheldon avoids” gag. At the end of the day, this is a comedy show and there has to be a laughs. Each couple has to have their ‘funny’. With Lenny it’s Leonard’s insecurity. With Howardette it’s the mother-child dynamic. And Amy wanting sex is Shamys current main punchline.

This seems to be dividing the canon fandom though. I understand that shippers want a true and loving union between their pair but any relationship involving Sheldon has to be funny. It can’t be all Sheldon ‘learns a lesson today’ or ‘Sheldon shows he can change’ scenes. The same would apply if the writers had chosen Shenny as canon. Sheldon and Penny would have to generate laughs and these would have to come from their differences and conflict. If Penny were dating him she would fight a lot harder over the sex issue and it would also be a lot funnier. Humour lightens the mood and softens the subject, which is actually quite serious. The reason Shamy don’t work for me is that Amy isn’t funny when she’s throwing shade at Sheldon. She’s a pity machine. You can’t pity the person Sheldon dates because he's such an arrogant git and pity unbalances the dynamic and takes away the comedy. It means the show has to drop in some overly sentimental scenes as damage control. And great comedy is not meant to be overly sentimental. That’s why Shenny would work because Sheldon and Penny meet on equal terms, they both have big enough egos to take each other on. They are both funnier and sexier.

[QueenOfShebaSays]

It’s a hot topic! Sheldon Lee Cooper has had sex for the first time and only time (so far) and I thought I’d open this thread to discuss the way it was handled and for members to talk about how they feel about this development.

Here’s my take:

Shamy sex was shown as quite sacrificial. Sheldon proved his affection by offering a sexual experience as a gift, because he knew what it meant to her. It was not portrayed as mutual attraction and was very in keeping with the history of the character. I was interested to see what they would do next with that. Would they make Sheldon change is mind about sex and feel more desires towards her? It seems not so far. They writers have already gone back to the old “Amy hints, Sheldon avoids” gag. At the end of the day, this is a comedy show and there has to be a laughs. Each couple has to have their ‘funny’. With Lenny it’s Leonard’s insecurity. With Howardette it’s the mother-child dynamic. And Amy wanting sex is Shamys current main punchline.

This seems to be dividing the canon fandom though. I understand that shippers want a true and loving union between their pair but any relationship involving Sheldon has to be funny. It can’t be all Sheldon ‘learns a lesson today’ or ‘Sheldon shows he can change’ scenes. The same would apply if the writers had chosen Shenny as canon. Sheldon and Penny would have to generate laughs and these would have to come from their differences and conflict. If Penny were dating him she would fight a lot harder over the sex issue and it would also be a lot funnier. Humour lightens the mood and softens the subject, which is actually quite serious. The reason Shamy don’t work for me is that Amy isn’t funny when she’s throwing shade at Sheldon. She’s a pity machine. You can’t pity the person Sheldon dates because he's such an arrogant git and pity unbalances the dynamic and takes away the comedy. It means the show has to drop in some overly sentimental scenes as damage control. And great comedy is not meant to be overly sentimental. That’s why Shenny would work because Sheldon and Penny meet on equal terms, they both have big enough egos to take each other on. They are both funnier and sexier.

All of this! I also think that if shenny was a thing that when Sheldon realized he was ready to go there it would have been bc he himself was 100% sure, he wouldn't be doing it as a "gift" for Penny's birthday (and Penny wouldn't have guilted him into it or gave him an ultimatum for it... Really???) it would have been mutual and he'd have talked to Penny about it and it would have been nice. And I could see him enjoying it enough that they would be actively having coitus on the show regularly. It's just the way they work. Even Jim said that the Shenny Kiss made sense in how shenny interact with each other, I could see any shenny coitus going that same route (he also said the after coitus dialogue between shenny would very enjoyable... So yeah.) their personalities, their banter, how they go at each other and how they lift each other up is very important...  But instead we get... What we have right now.

[devilbk]

It would be fun to watch Penny figure out how to seduce Sheldon. There would be some fun trial and error because a lot of the tricks she knows wouldn't work on Sheldon. But there are some that would only work on Sheldon. Like giving him another reason to like trains.

[Trust No One]

Shenny and sex would be scientific with a lot of experimenting. That would be how Penny could approach things with Sheldon. Sheldon could not say no to science. When Sheldon was locked out and the guys went to Vegas and Sheldon was staying with Penny, Penny could have suggested a kiss as an experiment.  What a wasted chance.

[Tuesday Pajamas]

Putting Shenny aside for one moment, I think sex with Sheldon is problematic no matter who the girl is. To be fair I think he writers have tried to perserve the origins of the character with the coitus storyline they wrote. His lack of sexual interest has been maintained. It was far too late in the Shamy plot for him to suddenly develop all these wanton urges, so they have made it about choice.

So will they now try to slowly sneak in some sexual attraction into the characters personality? Keep changing him until he's bonking every other day like Leonard? You don't see Sheldon reacting to what has happened at all, after all his denials and distainful remarks about sex in the past. He's oddly quiet.

Also, is he still asexual? They seem to suggesting his is. Maybe he loves Amy but when it comes down to it she just doesn't float his boat. I know we all have different theories on Sheldon's deal. I think he was written asexual and they changed him, made him fluid. But he still feels asexual to me ... I mean ONCE a year! What is he? A panda?

[Trust No One]

Putting Shenny aside for one moment, I think sex with Sheldon is problematic no matter who the girl is. To be fair I think he writers have tried to perserve the origins of the character with the coitus storyline they wrote. His lack of sexual interest has been maintained. It was far too late in the Shamy plot for him to suddenly develop all these wanton urges, so they have made it about choice.

So will they now try to slowly sneak in some sexual attraction into the characters personality? Keep changing him until he's bonking every other day like Leonard? You don't see Sheldon reacting to what has happened at all, after all his denials and distainful remarks about sex in the past. He's oddly quiet.

Also, is he still asexual? They seem to suggesting his is. Maybe he loves Amy but when it comes down to it she just doesn't float his boat. I know we all have different theories on Sheldon's deal. I think he was written asexual and they changed him, made him fluid and he could be seem as demisexual. But he still feels asexual to me ... I mean ONCE a year! What is he? A panda?

He did seem asexual TP, but to me Penny changed all that. Sheldon has always been interested in Penny he just did not know it or understand it.

[QueenOfShebaSays]

Putting Shenny aside for one moment, I think sex with Sheldon is problematic no matter who the girl is. To be fair I think he writers have tried to perserve the origins of the character with the coitus storyline they wrote. His lack of sexual interest has been maintained. It was far too late in the Shamy plot for him to suddenly develop all these wanton urges, so they have made it about choice.

So will they now try to slowly sneak in some sexual attraction into the characters personality? Keep changing him until he's bonking every other day like Leonard? You don't see Sheldon reacting to what has happened at all, after all his denials and distainful remarks about sex in the past. He's oddly quiet.

Also, is he still asexual? They seem to suggesting his is. Maybe he loves Amy but when it comes down to it she just doesn't float his boat. I know we all have different theories on Sheldon's deal. I think he was written asexual and they changed him, made him fluid and he could be seem as demisexual. But he still feels asexual to me ... I mean ONCE a year! What is he? A panda?

that panda line sounds like something Penny would say and then Sheldon would look at her fondly because she remembered something from one of the many educational nature docs they watched together lol.

You actually bring up a good point and tbh, I guess we have to give it up to the writers for that one (shamy clouded our judgment) that they have kept Sheldon very in character with regards to sex, he is NOT sexually attracted to Amy, he still seems to simply only like her bc of her mind and whatever.

I've read about Asexuals and there are some who have no interest in sex, but like having a partner... it would have been great to show Shamy being a relationship where he does not want to have sex, just not ever, and Amy is okay with it, those do exist! but she is so selfish and tptb are not open minded enough to attempt that. I mean why do it if you're not going to go all the way? why just make him do the deed simply to make her happy? that's not okay, so far Sheldon is the only one giving and changing and Amy is taking and never changing.

anyway... yeah... I do think that Shenny would have gone down differently that Sheldon would feel differently toward Penny then he does with Amy (more comfortable, more ready to try new stuff, eager and excited bc Penny makes it interesting and isn't forcing him to change etc)

Sheldon doesn't like to hug, he doesn't like that physical contact, it's more than just germs, there are people who don't like being touched, call it whatever you want... Penny broke through that barrier, not by force but just by being her, she hugs him the pilot, she doesn't know better, the next time a hug happens it's his doing. Later we see him touch her sometimes and she touches him casually, they've slowly started to do this, it's natural and very realistic. pretty soon they hug a couple more times, and Penny always asks him first, she knows how he feels, but she also knows he will let her hug him. and the  we get the hug in the 200th.

now apply that to if they were in a relationship, remove Amy and insert Penny for the last 9 years, being friends and then   bf/gf and slowly getting used to touching and kissing and etc. he doesn't have to be asexual... but i do feel like shenny, just the friendship, is more realistic in development then the romantic relationship he has with Amy.

(end me blabbering nonsense....)

[Tuesday Pajamas]

He did seem asexual TP, but to me Penny changed all that. Sheldon has always been interested in Penny he just did not know it or understand it.

Over the years he's gone over to her apartment too many times for just a roommate of her boyfriend. They developed a very odd bond and I think they are both drawn and repelled by each other. I really like that about them. I'm not sure I can agree that Penny changed his asexuality though. She challenged him and he dealt her some blows over the years. So they are kind of even. It does feel like Sheldon has always left a metaphysical 'door' open to Penny. I'm not sure she's ever seen him as viable but she does love him. I think something would have to happen for Penny to see Sheldon differently. You know... in canon...

[QueenOfShebaSays]

Over the years he's gone over to her apartment too many times for just a roommate of her boyfriend. They developed a very odd bond and I think they are both drawn and repelled by each other. I really like that about them. I'm not sure I can agree that Penny changed his asexuality though. She challenged him and he dealt her some blows over the years. So they are kind of even. It does feel like Sheldon has always left a metaphysical 'door' open to Penny. I'm not sure she's ever seen him as viable but she does love him. I think something would have to happen for Penny to see Sheldon differently.

I would honestly be happier, if we didn't have Shamy, but just kinda asexual Sheldon, and Lenny... I would prefer that. because we'd still have the shenny as friends interactions. he wouldn't be a "threat" to anyone and so they could still interact. we would still have these awesome moments between them, her going to him about her stupid marriage, him encouraging her to keep going after her dream... etc. them being this extremely close and wonderful friendship that is honestly kinda rare on tv these days. i kiss that more then anything. I would take Shenny Friendship over anything else, because it is the most real and honest of the the whole show.

[SpaceAnJL]

Two things here from me-

One I've said before, Sheldon lacks appropriate socialisation at a peer level. He was unable to connect with kids, and was some kind of sideshow for adults. His template for (marital) relationships was his parents, which, even before the stereotyping and retconning, sounded difficult. Then, his source for social cues in later life consisted of a lech, a mute and a desperate scraping of Oedipal wreckage, all of whom seem to regard getting sex as a life goal. No wonder he backed away from the idea of relationships, all the ones he has been exposed to are dysfunctional and unhealthy.

Two, Amy Farrah Fowler is meant to be a disgusting figure of fun. She's a nasty stereotype anyway, the plain brain desperate for sex. She could have been sympathetic, rather than just pathetic, but she lacks any charm at all. Licking people's belongings is not cute. Witholding medication to get your own way is not cute. Torturing things in a lab whilst making sexual innuendos is not cute. I could go on, but... The character is deliberately dressed to be unappealing. That is the whole 'joke'. It's offensive, misogynistic, anti-intellectual, and made significantly worse by the inner nature of the character. Nobody is meant to find her attractive.

The combination means that the punchline of this entire clusterfuck is, essentially, 'smart won't get you laid, so however brilliant your career or achievements, it means nothing, haha' - and validating some horrendous behaviours in the process. Sheldon has been encouraged, bullied, in fact, by everyone around him to engage in ways he finds confusing, uncomfortable and distasteful. No wonder he's regressed to licking toys and can't find his way out of buildings.

As a personal note, I think he is actually a perfectly normal male who lacks experience or comprehension of certain social situations. He's attracted to Penny, but the peer group have wrecked his self-perception and confidence, he's been told not to trust his instincts. He's not attracted to Amy, who is deeply unappealing, but everyone is telling him to give in. He's one lone individual, who has had his unique self damaged and battered until he's broken. Originally, he had confidence in his originality, but that's been taken away from him. All he has now is drab, stunted, boring and disgusting.