Wishful Thinking...

[Louise]

Halloween is making me want a crossover between BBT and the 1999 version of The Mummy. Or just anything that combines BBT with Egyptology/archaeology/treasure-hunting.

Or, some JAWS-like aquatic adventure with submarines and stuff. I want every type of AU and crossover you can imagine. The more bizarre, the better.

[ricardo shillyshally]

Oh there's so much they could do with cross overs. Must admit I only watched those Mummy films several times because I love Rachel Weisz. Unfortunately I also love Daniel Craig, so a hit is out! I think we all believe that when A&B entered the plot, the show plummeted in quality, and meaning. But really we have to examine the psychology of those that think these tedious characters have any value. They, and their fav characters are one dimensional sheep, who wouldn't know quality if it smacked them in the face. We should pity them, maybe start up a collection. Therapy is expensive!

[Louise]

I think we all believe that when A&B entered the plot, the show plummeted in quality, and meaning. But really we have to examine the psychology of those that think these tedious characters have any value.

It occurred to me yesterday that there is not one solid argument in favor of A and B's presence. Not one. If there were, I would admit it.

[ricardo shillyshally]

Here's The Mummy crossover.

[devilbk]

It occurred to me yesterday that there is not one solid argument in favor of A and B's presence. Not one. If there were, I would admit it.

Perhaps TPTB felt that they needed a couple of people to use up all the oxygen on the set.

[ricardo shillyshally]

Now Leonard Must have insulted Joyce Kim, and I'm sure we can convince Chinese that Amy slurred them. Then they hack CBS and threaten them, unless they revert to original formula of BB.

[Louise]

This is all pure fantasy, I don't expect any of this to actually happen.
(after all, it's the Wishful Thinking thread.)

Do I think this show can be salvaged? No, I don't. But if I were a dictator, this is what I'd do:

Fire the writers. Fire them all. Get new writers who know relatively little about the show, so that they're fresh and unbiased. Maybe look outside the usual Hollywood circles and get some outsiders, people who are new on the scene.

New writers are necessary because lately, they've been f*cking-up even the scenes with just the guys, or just Shenny.

Make them watch S1 and S2 (and maybe a few selected eps from 3/4) until their eyes bleed. I would also prohibit them from watching or studying any eps from S5 onward, or using those eps as a reference.
(except for maybe a few selected scenes that are good.)

One might argue that it'd be good to have the writers compare and contrast some old, good eps with some newer, crappy ones, but I'm of the opinion that it would be much better for them to enter the situation with no preconceived notions, untainted by the later seasons, with the old eps fresh in their minds. I might do the compare-and-contrast thing with the *actors*, though. IMO the ideal would be writers who had barely even seen the show before, and knew almost nothing about it.

Have actual *meetings* and *discussions* about what works and what doesn't, in S1 and S2. Almost like a film-studies class in college. Make them study the characters the same way one would in a literature class.

Ditto with the actors.

IMO nothing could save this show's trajectory except for a slight reboot, which I will describe as follows:

Gradually phase-out A and B. The fact that H/B are *married* and not just dating complicates things (as does the Lenny engagement.) But, this is why I mentioned a mild reboot:

The phasing-out of A and B could take about half a season. Let them go on a business trip or something and appear via Skype; the details really don't matter. Do it sloooowly, and don't draw attention to it or comment on it.

Then, when a new season begins, just proceed without them. ***They are minor characters who were around for a while and are now gone, just like Priya, Stephanie, Lucy, Ramona, Leslie, Alex, whoever.*** This is not without precedent. In fact, it has tons of precedent. Female characters disappear from this show so often, you'd think there was a serial killer in action...

I don't mean *literally* pretending that this is Season 1 and the main cast are all 25 years old. More like they've been gone for a while, and some time has elapsed, and now they're back. And maybe they're a bit older and wiser. The 5 have continued to live and work and grow older, but this new season (9? 10?) represents the start of a new continuity and a clean break with the old continuity, such as it was.

No long-drawn-out breakup/divorce storylines. I truly predict that the casual viewer is not going to demand an explanation for the absence of A&B, if you do it very gradually and subtly and you keep them distracted with good new eps. A&B were minor characters, they were here and now they're gone, no big deal, moving on. **Once they're gone, don't mention them.**

People who watch syndicated episodes are watching them all out of order, jumbled-up. I'll hazard a guess that they have little or no sense of a time-line, with this show. If you're watching the episodes all out of order, then some eps have A&B, and some don't...and that works very much to our advantage, because it's gonna take the casual viewer a long time to even pick up on their departure. Half a dozen Shamies will scream with rage, everyone else will feel like "this is the same good show it's always been", and the absence of A&B would be only a bit more noticeable than the fact that some eps have Priya and some don't, for example. People will sit down and watch an S2 episode, followed by an S7 episode, followed by a Shiny-New-S9 episode and think: "hey, this show has more good eps than bad."

For people who hate Lenny, I have not forgotten you: L&P mutually agree to end their engagement. That's all. That's it. No wailing and gnashing of teeth. Leonard can date various minor characters or whoever. Doesn't really matter. The rebooted version of this show would not be about putting everyone into couples. When the new season begins, the engagment is never mentioned again. L&P dated on and off for a while, as many people do, and now they're not dating anymore. Happens all the time in real life. Simple and realistic. I'm sure everyone knows someone IRL who has ended an engagement.

Oh, and I don't like the Raj/Emily pairing, so....goodbye, Emily, we hardly knew ye. Return to the ether with Lucy. And no more of this extremely unpleasant Stuart-Mrs.W storyline, either. REBOOT. This show is not about pairings and girlfriends.

Divorce is trickier, but I'm gonna be really daring and say just hand-wave that issue. B. is gone. Where is she? Casual viewers don't give a damn. She's wherever Leslie and Stephanie went. Howard can be roomies/neighbors with Raj. We're not pretending like it's S2 again, we're just proceeding as if A and B are irrelevant. "The 43rd Peculiarity" was S6, and it has no A or B whatsoever, even though they were firmly entrenched by that time. It can be done.

I would say "just reduce them to recurring status", but H/B being *married* complicates that, and it doesn't address the Lenny, either. Hence: slight reboot.

Would I expect the classic characters to come roaring back and kick the door down? No. My expectations would be low. But, I believe we could have some simple, pleasant, low-key episodes with nothing disturbing or upsetting in them, nothing that would make Nostalgics cringe. It might be rather bittersweet, but it would be watchable. I'm not talking about Raj being stricken mute again and Howard humping the furniture. But I think these people have it in them to turn out some mildly enjoyable, gently humorous scenes which won't make Nostalgics want to slit their wrists with a butterknife.

Would it be as hilarious and inspired as before? No. But I'd like to think we could have a final season of modestly-enjoyable eps which are not an embarassment or a travesty.

No more weepy melodramatic shit. I would start with eps and storylines that are very not-ambitious, for lack of a better description. *Keep It Simple, Stupid.* High effort, high standards, but low expectations. And certainly no weddings or babies.

Lastly, once this clean-slate season has begun, I would have a staff member whose whole job is to be Continuity Nazi and keep a file on each character's personality and what that person would/wouldn't do or say. Maybe they'd all be a bit calmer and wiser, after having gone through so much shit. But they'd have a fraction of their spark back.

Of course, the elephant in the room is JP and his performance. But I'll defer to other HQers, on that question.

[devilbk]

JP could be fixed by a decent director who won't take shit. And decent material.

[FlyingMonkey]

Louise for dictator!

[Louise]

Why, thank you, Monkey! *salutes* XD