Relationships

[Louise]

I would say the chances of Sheldon having some sort of sex is pretty high considering he was alone at college and spent at least some time alone in Europe while he was guest lecturing and cocked ring his Child progeny status, he probably spent a lot of time being brought up to donors like a prized cow. Just think, Shirley Temple was 12 when producers started trying to "get her on the casting couch".

Most likely Sheldon was used or molested by another student, Facilty Member, or donor. Between the teen hormones raging and his lack of social skills, he was probably easy prey and would explain his need for complete control and twitching when someone touched him in the early seasons.

Wow. The idea of Sheldon having been molested/exploited hadn't occurred to me. But I suppose that *does* often happen to people who lack the ability to read social cues or recognize inappropriate behavior...

ETA: I didn't phrase that very well, I didn't mean to imply that everyone with Apergers has been molested or something. Hopefully you see what I mean.

[Nutz]

It's not about Autisim, but about child prodigies. Ask any really famous child actor and they will have at least one story about an adult who tried to have sex/or had sex with them. Unfortunately there are people out there who want the power of saying they "had" a star, so I don't imagine it's much different in the academic world. Powerful donors will want a piece of a genius, faculty members and students will use teen hormones again a child to steel their work. Disgusting? Yes, but true.

Of course Lorre would say that Sheldon never was molested, just like he doesn't have a diagnosis of Aspergers, since it would make the character to "sympathetic" (like you can't have dark subjects be humorous) but to be humorous with things like cancer, Aids, mental illness and molestation you have to understand the subject, do your homework, and be talented enough to see the "real" humor and not go for the easy joke.

[ricardo shillyshally]

I'm not sure if it's a restriction of sitcoms. If characters are on screen for 70 hours, they need to develop, gain depth. It seems to me like there's a sort of 'disneyification' , on TV. It's not worth watching Tv here, before 11pm, or worth watching certain channels(BBC1) because of censorship. There might be a child watching. It's a bit like the cat in the box.

[ricardo shillyshally]

Isn't a good relationship based on being friends first. I think it helps if both people have some shared interests, as well as some individual interests which the other person wishes to incorporate into theirs. Of course Dawkins will say it's all genes/hormones/procreation, and that is part of a successful relationship, but there needs to be more for it to last. I think L is only after sex with Penny, as someone said, 'what do you two talk about'. I think B and H only had problematic mothers in common. A has nothing in common with S. So I'd say all these phoney relationships are only based on sex, and not wanting to be alone. Therefore they won't last.

[devilbk]

The problem is that these are fictitious relationships and they can ignore sense and reality entirely. As they already have.

[ricardo shillyshally]

But isn't that the problem, for fiction to work it has to have a semblance of reality. That's why the original cast meant alot to us, they seemed real. But obviously the relationships seem forced, unreal and unrealistic. None of the individuals in the couples were really friends, who came to have feelings for each other. L just kept pestering, and H and S were told they'd never do better. I just think they are sending out a bad idea of relationships, for ratings.

[Louise]

I wanted to comment further on these words of Pj's, but I didn't want to put it in the Rewind thread because that would be OT:

He loved tall women and I remember thinking "Oh shit!" when Bernadette was so short. It's not in line with his character! Howard was a guy who aimed HIGHER.

This is why I don't like even the S3 version of Bernadette. I didn't watch this show in chronological order, so I don't remember my initial reaction to her first episode (Candy Coating), but she is simply not a match for Howard and simply not a match for the style/vibe of the show.

I've said this before, but to me she always looks like she's been Photoshopped into the scene. Visually, stylistically, something is just "off." Too pastel, too Little Miss Muffet. Everything about the character is cartoony and contrived, she doesn't seem like a real person on any level. The other characters are wildly eccentric and colorful, yet there's a core of believability which invites us to empathize with them.

I'll admit that there are scenes/eps/moments where B. appears to be proud of Howard or find him admirable, attractive, cute, lovable, whatever. I admit that. I try to play fair with my criticisms. But I don't like those moments, either. This character is just a wholesale "NOPE", to me.

If Bernadette started being nice (or at least reasonable) all the time, would I suddenly be in favor of that ship? Absolutely not. The sweet moments ring false. Her "love" for Howard is not unconditional. She loves him when he's doing things she approves of and behaving in ways that are sanctioned by her. She "loves" him when he's compliant.

If this character remained the way she was in S3, and remained a minor character, I might not actively hate her but I still wouldn't be keen on the idea. That would at least allow me to skip the scenes/eps with her in them, which is my approach to S3 anyway.

I know that nobody else cares about this, but I ship Howard/Raj and for me there is no substitute for that. I wouldn't expect or even want the canon to go forward with that, but they certainly could've left the characters unattached and left things open to interpretation, which is what I would prefer. If H and R were each just casually dating various people, that doesn't feel like closing the door on my ship. But an H-R-B love triangle is sad and disturbing to me, not funny or juicy. That S4 "kiss" is mocking the idea of an H/R ship, not endorsing it. Ironically enough, I find the bizarre kissing-machine scene to be more natural, in spite of the un-natural circumstances.

Now Bernadette has turned into this Pandora's Box of ugly behaviors, but she's still a flat character with no essence, no solid personhood. Like the cryptic old saying about Los Angeles, "there's no *there*, there."

Even if Bernadette had done **nothing else** objectionable, looking my fave in the eye and saying "You're an idiot" would be enough to incur my everlasting hate. I wouldn't allow anyone to treat *me* that way. (and that he agrees, and that this is treated as something cute/funny, is so gross.)

[Louise]

Hmm...found this random quote from a Carolyn Hax advice column:

"[Don't] make someone your romantic partner unless and until you learn that, in general, you actually love the same people and things. It’s unrealistic to expect someone to have everything in common with you, but you certainly can find a better match than someone who feels displeasure “every time” in response to things you hold dear."

[SpaceAnJL]

Hmm...found this random quote from a Carolyn Hax advice column:

"[Don't] make someone your romantic partner unless and until you learn that, in general, you actually love the same people and things. It’s unrealistic to expect someone to have everything in common with you, but you certainly can find a better match than someone who feels displeasure “every time” in response to things you hold dear."

This of course runs headlong into the BBT idea that Any Partner is Better than No Partner. Certain people have the show-given right to alter other characters as they see fit. Protagonist Privilege, given over to some truly disgusting specimens.

[Louise]

This of course runs headlong into the BBT idea that Any Partner is Better than No Partner. Certain people have the show-given right to alter other characters as they see fit. Protagonist Privilege, given over to some truly disgusting specimens.

Yes. I've also noticed that the BBT "relationships" are a competition with a winner and a loser. There's grudge-keeping and score-keeping. Very counterproductive, very ungenerous of heart, and ugly. There's loads of both overt and covert hostility between these "lovers."